22 July 2008

And To Think They Turn Into Men.....

For those of us who have sons ... and for those who are happy that they don't.
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And my personal favourite.....
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Interesting facts you learn when you have sons:
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(1) A king size water-bed holds enough water to fill a 200 m2 house to a depth of 10 cm.
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(2) If you spray hair-spray on dust balls and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
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(3) A 3-year old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
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(4) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 20 Kg boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 6m x 6m room.
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(5) You should not throw cricket balls up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
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(6) A ceiling fan can hit a cricket ball a long way.
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(7) The glass in windows (even double-glazed) doesn't stop a cricket ball hit by a ceiling fan.
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(8) When you hear the toilet flush and the words 'uh oh', it's already too late.
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(9) Brake fluid mixed with bleach makes smoke, and lots of it.
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(10) A six-year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.
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(11) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old boy.
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(12) Play-dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
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(13) Super glue is forever.
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(14) No matter how many jelly crystals you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
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(15) Pool filters do not like jelly crystals.
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(16) VCR's do not eject 'BL&T' sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
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(17) Rubbish bags do not make good parachutes.
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(18) Marbles in petrol tanks make lots of noise when driving.
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(19) You probably DO NOT want to know what that smell is.
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(20) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
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(21) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
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(22) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
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(23) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
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Feel free to add lessons you have learned in the comments below!

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10 comments:

Belle said...

My eldest son and daughter have grown up, but I have an eight year old girl. I am so pleased that she is a girl. lol.

A Spoonful Of Sugar said...

Too funny!!! and so true.

Tine said...

OH MY GOODNESS! I am laughing out loud here!!! "Superglue is forever"... LOL!
My son is only 1 year old, but I guess I'll consider myself warned :-)

tillyboo said...

Brilliant post !
Tips for legoland when you go .. take (unless you mind kids getting wet) changes of clothes, swimming costumes, food & snacks, comfy pair of shoes as lots of walking - uphill on way back ! Have a great time. Oh & get there early to park at the front and avoid queues for at least part of the day x

Tip Top said...

Hhahahahah!!! My two love peeing into empty bottles but can they aim straight into a large toilet bowl? Nope..........

Gypsy said...

i have a son and 2 daughters. it's the same, like a dozen children in all!

Esther said...

Grin I have two, one nearly 5 and the other four months.. I also have four nephews we don't seem to believe in having girls this generation. Christmas once they are all old enough to play together is going to be "interesting"

Anonymous said...

Never eat the liver of a polar bear it has lethal doses of vitamin D. (Quote from SAS survival handbook, bought by his grandma for my son when he was9.It also prompted him to want a condom for his survival kit to carry 2 litres of water. As a good Catholic mother I declined his request)
I particularly love the last photo.

Ringmaster said...

I do not know if I should laugh or cry. I live in that world of 3 little boys.

Mine are especially challenged.

Yes I said Challenged.

momof2gr8kids said...

oh god where did you get all those photos.?? they are hysterical.. and true.. darn it.